Beautiful Ghosts is built on the premise that having a conversation about life is beneficial. As much as we would all like to “get on with things”, stopping to share and discuss how it all feels like, and developing an inner life will lead to personal growth and a more fulfilling life. In fact, in the previous blog post we talked about how talking with someone we trust can help in the development of an inner life. Is there a role for psychotherapy in this?
In Episode 12 of Beautiful Ghosts (listen with your favourite podcast app, YouTube, or website) we discussed psychotherapy. Is psychotherapy more accepted in certain cultures than others? Can it help with the development of an inner life? Who should do it?
Starting with how psychotherapy is more or less accepted in different cultures. Mariana, Nico, and I are originally from Buenos Aires, Argentina, according to Mariana the city with most psychotherapists in the world. A quick online search seems to confirm this. While in New Zealand, where we live now, there is very little psychotherapy. There is also a difference in the type of psychotherapy as that same article points out. While in Argentina the predominant type of therapy is psychoanalysis, the school founded by Sigmund Freud, in other countries the predominant type is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. So why is psychotherapy not common in New Zealand and other cultures? First, people are more reserved in terms of sharing or discussing private life issues. Rather than discussing your inner struggles, it is more common to go to the pub and bury those struggles in alcohol. Of course, this may be a generalisation or stereotype as we discussed in Episode 11 with Phil, but it may be a reason why therapy is less widespread. Also, there seems to be a stigma that if you need psychotherapy, then you must be having mental health problems that require clinical intervention, you are a loony. Is that so? Is psychotherapy only useful when something is already broken or can be used as a tool to help develop an inner life?
At Beautiful Ghosts we have the full spectrum. Mariana first attended psychotherapy when she was 14 years-old when she was having problems with anorexia. In 6 months she was cured. Then she also had therapy when she was 26 to help her deal with a traumatic experience. These are two clear cases where there is no doubt that psychotherapy intervention was needed. Mariana found that both interventions helped her with the healing process and she believes anyone would benefit from psychotherapy. Nico, on the other hand, attended psychotherapy because he wasn’t completely happy about himself and wanted get to know himself better. In some of these sessions, he heard things he didn’t really want to hear. Those were “pills that were hard to swallow” as he puts it, but he found psychotherapy to be of benefit. I have personally not been to psychotherapy. Only once, I discussed with a psychotherapist whether I needed therapy because I felt something was holding me back in terms of achieving more in life. She said “you have completed a PhD, have a family and are a responsible parent, you work, and you are reasonably happy, you don’t need therapy”. I joked in the episode that I was discharged in the first session but I found that advice to be useful. Mariana, on the other hand, felt this idea that “if you work and have a family, you don’t need therapy” is outrageous. So, what is the conclusion? Have Mariana and Nico convinced me about psychotherapy?
First of all, I’m not a medical doctor, but in clinical cases such as described by Mariana, or other serious mental health problems such as depression, I have no doubts that psychotherapy is an excellent tool. Given my science background, I would have a preference for Cognitive Behavioural Theory rather than Psychoanalysis. Moving to less severe cases such as Nico described, I still think therapy can be useful. If you are not happy with yourself, have a grey perspective on life, or are using work, alcohol, or other type of escapism, then therapy should be beneficial. As Nico commented, it is important to find a good therapist, someone that inspires trust and you are comfortable with. In those cases, there are other resources apart from therapy that we have discussed in previous blog posts: meditation, reflection, and support groups. Finally, when one is reasonably happy but are looking for someone to speak to for further insights and personal growth, although I can see it could be beneficial, I still do not see psychotherapy as necessary. Finding a group of friends, such Beautiful Ghosts, or using support groups, is probably a good place to start. In those cases, I am perhaps more open to the concept of life coaching rather than psychotherapy, but that would be the topic for another post. The one important message that remains is that whether through therapy or otherwise, for developing your inner life and personal growth, do speak about your life with someone you trust.
Make an impact,
Pablo
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Image Wikimedia Commons.
This post was first published in Beautiful Ghosts.